For this piece of writing I have focussing on my vocabulary and punctuation. I have been learning to..
- use a range of precise vocabulary to communicate meaning (Year ⅞)
- use all basic punctuation independently and attempt more complex punctuation (eg semicolons, colons, parentheses) (Year 7/8)
The pieces of my writing that are highlighted green are where I have shown my vocabulary and punctuation goal
My story Peer Pressure
My hands felt clammy with sweat. I was really nervous about this whole high school thing. I watched every high school clique there was I don’t know if that made me prepared or not .
The voice startled me I \ around ], there was an average height girl, black hair with blue highlights. She had her skirt hitched so it made even the uniform look cool.
“Sarah?” I say more as a question.
She Gnawed on her her gum thoughtfully ”I’m harmony, I know sucky name but I didn’t choose it” Harmony says.
I felt this was the end of our conversation so I take off towards Block E.
“Oi sarah wanna ditch with me, Y'know always good on the first day cause they never suspect a thing” Harmony says for of a command then a question.
I didn’t really want to miss the my first class, did I? BUt I didn’t want to disappoint harmony.
I surprised myself how casual I sounded”
“Let's do this”
I nod in answer.
“ We’ll go down to the dairy and get some chocolate or something”Harmony says.
“I don’t have any money” I say nervously
“You don’t need no money” she says with a high pitched ;laugh.
“No. were going to steal stuff” Harmony says in duh tone.
Butterflies swarm in my stomach , no way was me sarah connolly going to do this. I was always the good girl with perfect grades. Maybe it was time for a change.
Harmony and I had now arrived at the dairy and my nerves were worse than ever.
“ trust me you won’t get caught I’ve done this a million times before”
I gulp nervously act cool,act cool. I don’t want to act like a total whimp.
“I’ll show you what I can do” Harmony says before stepping into the dairy .
I waited what felt like hours but really was only five minutes.Harmony chucks me a block of chocolate.
I nod before I swiel into the dairy. The lady at the counter bowed over counting money. The perfect opportunity .
I heads towards the chocolate stall and grab a twix twisting it around my thumb was I really gonna do this. My thoughts jitter from when I won the spelling bee to when I meet harmony.
This wasn’t the right choice. I drop the chocolate and go up yo the counter.
“ Can I report shoplifting”